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As an interuniversity athlete, I am subject to doping control.

So, theoretically, because I am possibly the slowest varsity swimmer in the country, CCES reserves the right to demand I let someone watch me pee into a cup, or they may not let me lose swimming races anymore. Marajuana, Hashish, and Cannabis are banned substances according to WADA, or so says the handy little sheet I was handed, so they are obliged to test for cannaboids. Sure, that makes everyone faster and stronger. E's specifically mentioned too. Someone, possibly as I type, is checking to see if I need an exemption for my asthma medication.

Seriously, you can't make stuff like this up. Every olympics, ever medal winner (down to a couple non-medals, I think) immediately has to go from their competition to someone who will watch them pee into a cup. What an honour. Now I, who may never make the qualifying times for any meet, may get to have the olympic gold medal winner treatment. I'm so excited.


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